As Jes Foord and husband Jono celebrate five years of marriage, we look back at how life has changed for the local icon and activist
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Our wedding was perfect,” says Jes. “We were surrounded by over 100 of our closest friends and family, and danced until we were asked to leave! It’s incredible to know that so many people care about you, and we still feel their support today.”
Since getting married on April 23, 2011, Jes and Jono have welcomed twins Daniel and Layla to the family – a dynamite pair who light up any room. “My perspective on life has changed dramatically now that I have children of my own,” she says. “I want to be open and honest with them, so that they feel comfortable coming to me about anything. I never want to be overprotective because the last thing I want is them sneaking around and getting into trouble.
“As soon as they are able to understand, I want to teach them about their bodies, so that it isn’t a sensitive topic and so that they know to speak up if anyone ever makes them feel uncomfortable.
“Jono is an incredible husband and father,” Jes continues. “He is a hands-on dad and is always there for us when we need him, without being macho.
“For me, personally, he has always treated me as a person, not as a victim, which I need. We acknowledge what happened when necessary, but it isn’t a constant factor in our lives.”
The Jes Foord Foundation (JFF) has made a difference to thousands of lives since its establishment in 2008. “The vision has changed in the past five years, from the early focus on establishing specialised clinics to now creating awareness in communities across KZN. Official government statistics show that a rape was reported every nine minutes in 2014. That’s just the tip of the iceberg and we need to raise awareness more than ever! We have an incredible team who do talks in English and isiZulu, as well as trained counsellors who help those dealing with the trauma of rape.
Joy Hlongwane and Trish Buchanan, together with Jes, tailor their awareness talks to the audience and spoke to over 10 000 people in 2015. “The realities of rape are different from one community to another. People are not always encouraged to speak out.”
Rape survivors are invited for counselling at the JFF offices in Kloof and Marianhill, where the JFF Clinic is on its way to becoming a community hub.
The Foundation also works closely with members of the Hammarsdale community, including policeman Yani Khomo. “If we had a Yani Khomo in every community, South Africa would be a different place,” Jes exclaims. “He hosts awareness days on a range of topics and hosts events to bring the community together. The effect is remarkable.”
Other powerful initiatives by JFF include the Cinderella project, which gets matric dance dresses to girls who are unable to afford them. “In exchange, these girls put together a play, poem or song to teach their school about rape – what it is and what you should do if it happens to you.”
The Handbag project has had an incredible response from the public, with 4 000 bags donated in 2015. These are new or used handbags (in good condition), packed with items that can help a rape victim during the initial reporting process at the police station. These are things such as a facecloth, soap, deodorant spray and new underwear. The most important item in the bag, however, is a letter with a few words of encouragement to restore some hope to the victim during this traumatic time.
“This year, I have decided to take a step back from the Foundation and focus on my family,” says Jes. “I will still be involved, but won’t be telling my story on a weekly basis. In the beginning, it was part of the healing process, but it has become a difficult reminder. I wish I could be there for every person affected by rape, but it’s incredibly draining, emotionally, and I need to take time out for myself.
“It’s easy to live in a bubble, but these things can happen to anyone, anywhere. My message to anyone reading this is don’t live in fear, live aware!” *
www.jff.org.za
0861 333 449
The Jes Foord Foundation relies on donations to continue its work in the community.
