August 4, 2011. Why do you plank? I ask my teenage step-son, who’s iron-hard frame is admittedly perfectly suited to this arbitrary pursuit (for those not in the know, the “art of planking is to lie horizontally across any object or the ground with arms at the sides, aiming to pose in daring situations”.)
The flatter and more parallel with the ground you can get, the better, or so it seems to this old fogey.
“Uh, dunno, its fun. It’s awesome,” says the teen, in typical minimalist fashion, before busting out a huge cheesy grin.
He’d just been busted and given 25 000 different kinds of hell by his mother, who discovered planking operations undertaken by his “crew” in extremely dangerous situations. “We’re super amazing,” he further expanded on their philosophy and operational plan.
There are, by the way, more than 20.5 million Google results for planking. In an age of instant and dramatic gratification through social media, with “Likes”, sharing, Diggs and Mxit, and where parents unfortunately often throw around cash to appease annoying and demanding offspring, the more radical and cool, the better.
Yesterday’s news
But there’s some rather unhappy news for dedicated plankers . . . what they’re now undertaking is actually yesterday’s news, because now even more radical elements are getting in on the act. Planking is being left in the dust by such pursuits as “owling” and a specifically local pastime called “Shepping”.
Owling, or “crouching like an owl in unusual places”, is making its mark, leaving plankers everywhere in a deep funk, but, while this is commendably eccentric, our local Sheppers seem to be taking the cake. They have a vibrant Facebook group.
With members taking part in dedicated walks across the Shepstone building at the University of KwaZulu-Natal (UKZN). It’s all about being cool, and walking with dedication to the cause and a sense of style.
What’s the headspace? “Don’t be a loner. Join the movement to Shepping,” says one of the chief instigators, Nick Pitman.
So it’s all about interacting, making new contacts and showing you can walk with style . . . I think!
Indeed, perhaps it’s time to join the social revolution. I’m developing my own Shepping styles and have decided to called them: Shlooping, Shlocking, Shlepping, Shlounging and Shtyling. Think they’ll let a ballie show them some moves at Shepstone?