The Little Women in our Lives: 15 Things I want my daughter to know when life gets hard.
Right now my daughter is sitting at her little dining table devouring her Future Lice (that’s Future Life for grownups). She stops for a minute and get up to dance when Bundu Buddies start singing her favourite song.
There’s pink Future Life in her hair, her moves are not well coordinated and her cute little legs still have a roll or two.
She’s two. And she’s not worried about her dance moves, counting kilojoules, being bullied or the cool kid.
Right now she lives in the moment and she’s happy.
I wish I could hit the pause button. Keep her little a little longer, or maybe forever? I never want her to lose that innocence, that pure joy of just being alive.
But unfortunately, she will grow up. And unfortunately, life will get tough.
So I made a list to prepare you for life. This won’t soften the blows, but hopefully, it will help you with the journey.
- Stop comparing yourself
There will always be someone smarter, taller, and prettier than you. That’s just life. Stop wasting precious energy on comparisons. There’s someone out there who wants to be like you.
- Indulge!
Eat the cake, order chips instead of salad and enjoy every sip of your cappuccino (when you suffer from extreme nausea during your pregnancy, you will long for those indulgent days).
- Do not worry about the gap (or rather lack thereof) between your thighs
Right now you can count to 10. Don’t waste precious time, counting kilojoules. Eat well, exercise and be happy.
- Do count your blessings.
I’m still learning to do that and I’m 33. Always striving to be better, achieve more. Stop wasting time, always searching for the next big thing.
- Girl, put that record on!
Music has the power to change your mood, give you courage and make you happy. Do not underestimate the power of a good song, ever!
- Hit the gym!
Yes, a fit body is great, but what happens to your mind when you exercise is unexplainable and pretty damn awesome.
- Put “that” outfit on
When things get tough, the tough go shopping. Just joking, but no really. When things get hard, stay away from the yoga pants. Put on your favourite outfit, the one that makes you feel like Gigi Hadid.
- Marry a kind man
I do not want you to think about boys – ever. But if you do someday want to get married look for kindness.
- Half-hearted is not an option
If there’s one thing I’m proud of it’s my ability to get consumed by whatever I do. Whether it’s writing, eating or watching television – I’m doing it wholeheartedly. Furthermore please say goodbye to Mrs Self Doubt: Chase your biggest dreams, even if they scare you. You determine your own path. Be whatever you choose to be and make it happen.
- Let it all out!
You are pretty much doing it right now – going from extreme happiness to extreme sadness in a matter of minutes. Do not lose the ability to show your emotions. If you are sad, cry! If you are happy, laugh out loud. Please do not become one of those statue-like botox ladies, who smile all the time. It’s okay to have a bad day.
- Stop worrying!
Okay, I know this one is in all the self-help books, but it so true. Stop sweating the small stuff. There are some things you can change and then there are things you cannot change and no amount of worrying will change that.
- Put on red lipstick!
This is a family tradition and I expect you to honour it.
- Travel!
Yes, it’s expensive, but what happens to your soul is something money can’t buy. You realise that you’re actually a tiny part in a huge world. Standing at the edge of Mount Kenya is a moment that changed my life. I still think back to that exact moment, where I realised how little we actually are.
- Be kind (to everyone)!
Whether it’s the school principal, petrol attendant or your waiter. I’m telling you it makes the daily grind a lot more fun.
While we’re at it: Be gentle on yourself. We tend to be so damn hard on every aspect of who we are. Accept all the compliments coming your way and do not fret about someone saying bad things about you.
- Love your parents (and your family for that matter).
This one you probably won’t understand until you become a mom yourself. But the love I have for you is bigger than anything I have ever experienced. The saying goes: I love you to the moon and back but if someone has to measure my love for you that would have to go around and around and around the moon forever.
So please love me back, even one day when I’m irritating you with old-fashioned advice.
Because I love you unconditionally.
Right now you probably won’t understand any of this. But life will (unfortunately) not always be unicorns and rainbows. But hopefully, one day, when you are trying to raise your own little women, some of these things might make sense and make your life a little bit sweeter.
Love
Mommy
Written by Helene
Fashion and Lifestyle Mommy Blogger at PrettyBelle. I’m also a freelance writer and content creator. I’ve worked with brands like Superbalist, Clicks, KEEDO and Contempo.
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